Three days ago I had my breast biopsy. Yes, again with the damn MRI machine bangy-bangy bullshit.

The days before this test brought on a bit of agitation, but no fear or dread at all. My emotional state is more of a “Just tell me what this is, and let’s lop off my tits, and be done with this mess!” The masses are small and not invading any other tissue. Be gone with the boobs, and let me move on.

My wife and a dear friend of mine went with me to the UTSW Cancer Center. It was nice to have the company, but mentally I was on mission autopilot. Still no real anxiety. I was a little questionable on the whole needle through my boob scenario, but I had an “it is what it is” attitude. I do admit to having a little 1/2 ounce of Stagg Jr before leaving the house.

We didn’t sit but for a few minutes in the waiting room, before I was called back. Yes I took a selfie with them both, but then thought “is it weird to take selfies at a cancer center?”

Eh fuck it. I’m far from conventional.

So back to the loud-ass MRI room I went.

Again waggling my tits into two holes, but this time the left one was squished with a plate from the outer side. The plate had a grid with holes both vertical and horizontal. This was used as a guide to see where exactly to insert the needle, in order to gather the weird breast-invader tissue for testing.

Then the radiologist numbed my left boob, and stuck the biopsy needle in to gather tissue samples.

Yes the first two injections of lidocaine stung, but the rest was painless. The biopsy needle did not hurt, but the sound and pressure were weird to experience.

Now we wait for the results. This will be either Monday or Tuesday.

Yes, it is likely that I have Breast cancer. My gut is telling me it is more of a yes than a no. Of course there is a small chance this is benign, but honestly I doubt it.

No matter the result, I’m going to push for that double mastectomy. I have a ticking time bomb on my chest, and I do not need that kind of bullshit in my world.